So, last week I posted on my other blog about this topic and got such a great response that I really felt lead to share with you here as well…. and even elaborate a little more on this subject.

When things get tough… when things get hard… it is pretty tempting to listen to that voice in your head telling you to JUST GIVE UP. Give in. You want to know what my voice has been telling me? —-> What are you doing this for anyhow? It is totally easy to second guess all your hard work and effort into getting fit if your only reason is shaky at best anyhow. My reason? Cause I was just tired of being FAT. Over the past few months I have allowed myself one too many cheat meals… one too many beers… one too many excuses. And it is starting to show in how my clothes are fitting and how I am feeling. And that voice… it starts as a whisper… “this is hard” it says. Then a little louder “eating right is hard… this workout is hard” and my energy for the workout subsides. I find excuses to not push myself. My legs are sore, my abs hurt, I just don’t FEEL like it. And then that voice starts yelling, making me second guess myself… “WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS FOR?”

That voice was so loud in my head the other day. I was frustrated. I was down on myself. I listened to and reasoned with that voice. But I really didn’t have an answer. I spend at least an hour a day in my home gym. I try really hard to eat the right things. And still… MONTHS after I put these holiday lbs on… I am still not feeling it. I looked back at my social media from this time last year… I look like a really happy woman, definitely skinnier, and in better shape than I am right now. It caused me to really be down on myself. Cause this shiz is HARD.

I have been allowing myself to use “hard” as an excuse to not get anything done. I keep moving tasks from one day to the next day on my planner because… it just felt too “hard” to get it done that day. I keep telling myself I have nothing to write about here because… it’s just too “hard” to think of something creative or mind blowing to share with you. I don’t want to post something just to post something. And even that was too “hard” for me to deal with. I’m spiraling down and down and the only way I know how to stop this, is to just STOP it.

I know. Easier said than done. But I realized today, that I’m really not alone here…. and sometimes you just have to pick your hard. Pick it, tackle it, finish it and move on. Move on more accomplished. Move on with a little pep in your step. But just pick it and do it.

So. I picked my hard. I chose to share a little piece of my story that I don’t think I have ever told before…. and that is letting you in on a little secret.

People ask me all the time, “Joslin, how long will it take before I love to work out like you do?”

Truth? I hate to workout. I hate getting sweaty. I hate having to take the time. And I hate the pain. But you know what… I love the feeling afterward. The feeling of accomplishment. The feeling that I picked something hard to do, and I did it. I just…. have to pick my hard.

Before fitness became part of my life, it was hard. Life.

It was hard to look in the mirror. Period. Like… hard. I hated EVERY SINGLE THING about myself. I hated my haircut. I hated my double chin. I hated the rolls that I had acquired over the years. I hated the stretch marks and my c-section scar. I hated the cellulite (yes I have cellulite!) on my thighs. I hated the way my legs rubbed together (and still do!). It was hard to look in the mirror.

It was hard to go shopping. Nothing fit right. The lighting was terrible in stores. Bathing suit shopping was something I said with a hiss. It was hard to find something that made me feel beautiful.

It was hard to walk up the stairs without being out of breath… and if I had to lug groceries up those stairs….. even harder.

It was hard to put a smile on my face sometimes.

It was hard to feel sexy for my husband.

It. Was. Hard. (Among a million other reasons).

Now that fitness is a part of my life… all of those “hards” are gone. Now…..?

It is hard to find the motivation sometimes to get my workout in.

It is hard to skip dessert.

It is hard to peel myself out of bed for my morning workouts.

It is hard to fit my workouts in on days when I am running all over creation.

It is hard. Period. Some of my workouts are just plain HARD. They are physically demanding. They make me almost puke. They make me shake and cry and scream. They are hard.

It is hard to give myself some slack when I feel like I’m putting more effort in than what I am seeing in the mirror.

It is hard to believe that I can do it sometimes.

But I have picked my hard.

Today, I picked to share a little about why I would rather have THIS hard over THAT hard and hopefully it will inspire you to evaluate which hard you are ready to tackle. Just pick one.

Pick your hard.

And if you would like to join me, I am hosting a private online fitness support group, check it out on my page www.facebook.com/fitmomjoslin